Despite our identical voices, my mother and I could not be more opposite. I’m beginning to believe that God intends for daughters and mothers to be polar opposites for the benefit of the men in the home. I just cannot imagine if my dad had to deal with two women who thought and acted exactly the same. It must be for his benefit that my momma and I are so – very – different.
My mom was born to be a mom. It has been her “dream” in life. She didn’t want to be a doctor and save the world, she wasn’t interested in flying planes, building skyscrapers, or creating marketing plans for the Fortune 500 companies. Her dream was simple, but by no means easy. She always says even as a little girl she wanted to grow up and be a mom. I’m so glad God picked me to fulfill the desires of her heart.
It’s amazing to me how over the last 26 years my mom has been so many different things to me. She has been a caregiver, chef, chauffeur, referee, cheerleader, disciplinarian, tutor, teacher, counselor, entertainer, planner, organizer, stylist, interior designer, party planner, accountant, financial planner, and now that I’m older- a best friend.
I’ve never been that many things to a single person much less to a 4+ people all freaking day every day.
The older I’m getting the more the job and role of a Mother in her children’s life is becoming more and more of a serious decision rather than a cultural expectation to me. I see lots of people who have babies because it’s the next life step….or because it’s the byproduct of procreating without protection. However, I’m just not so sure I’m ok with having babies for the sake of it being the next step without considering the gravity your decisions or lack of decisions will have on your babies. This is where the difference between someone who has birthed children and actually parented children each step of the way comes in.
I’m not an actual mom. However, I’m pretty sure I’ve operated as one to my younger brothers and to quite a few of my small group girls over the years. The intentionality, time, selflessness, grace, patience, persistence, tears, prayers, trust…and the list goes on that is required to be a Mother is not a joke and I’ve only done it a percentage of time instead of being the on the clock 24/7. Motherhood is not a joke, cultural decision, for the benefit of ones self or fulfillment of the “American Dream”.
Some people really should not be allowed to populate the earth, but that is another topic for another day.
This upcoming Mother’s Day I’m excited to celebrate my mom and the amazing, strong woman that she is. She is like a diamond in the ruff to me. I know what our family has walked through and I’ve watched her fight tirelessly, faithfully and without ceasing for all people – her adopted son, her 3 biological children, her foster daughter, and the 15+ people who have lived with my family over the last 2 decades that she has selflessly parented.
She is a great mom. She exemplifies God’s unconditional love. She is committed to living without compromise. She is a fighter. She is honest and transparent about her life, struggles and moments of doubt. She never stays in a moment of struggle but has the exact same reaction to life’s ups and downs- she runs to God’s word and celebrates his promises whether she see’s their reality in her situations or not. She speaks kindly to those she encounters. She loves life.
I think motherhood looks so serious to me because I want to mother my own children how I was mothered. I want my children to be proud of me and overlook my flaws and imperfections, because the quality of my investment in their life drastically overshadows the reality that I am just human.
There are alot of people out there who have birthed children, but there are not nearly as many who are mothers. I have plenty of people in my reach who have moms but they were never mothered. I hate that for them and how I see voids in their life where a mother should have helped and instructed them
I’m not sure how I got so lucky, but I did hit the mom jackpot. There is no amount of money worth a woman who has committed her life to making yours all that it can be and who hasn’t even complained along the way when you were positive you were smarter than her in your “know it all” season of life.
Happy Mother’s Day to my sweet Momma who has never given up on me, always celebrated me, spoken truth into my world and encouraged me to pursue God and his dream for my life regardless of if that looks normal or not. Her children MOST DEF rise up and call her BLESSED.